St. Catherine Ministry

Miscarriage FAQs

While we would like to connect with you directly to offer support, perhaps just having a little bit more information about miscarriage can help right now. Read on for our Miscarriage Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs). With miscarriage, there is a sudden shift from the joy of expecting a child to the sorrow of preparing for and recovering from miscarriage. Knowing about the miscarriage experience makes it less bewildering.

I’ve been told by my doctor that I will miscarry. What now?

You may begin bleeding right away or experience no symptoms for a while. If you are healthy, don’t hesitate to advocate for yourself to delay or avoid a D&C (dilation and curettage) to remove baby. On the other hand, if your body is not miscarrying on its own, you may need to ask about miscarriage induction. Follow your doctor’s medical advice. Once you have begun bleeding, prepare to recover your baby’s body, which may or may not be recognizable, depending on baby’s gestation or other factors. Most likely, you will recover your baby while you sit on the toilet or over the bathtub. Use a miscarriage kit or clean Tupperware container to recover your baby’s body, including any clots. We offer free kits through St. Catherine Ministry and Our Lady of Hope Clinic. Attempt to retain what you can for baby’s burial. If it is impossible to recover baby, don’t worry. You can still memorialize your baby. Store baby in saline solution or in the freezer to preserve baby for burial. If you miscarry in the context of a hospital, advocate to receive your baby’s remains. If the miscarriage doesn’t happen right away, carry the miscarriage kit or Tupperware container in your purse so that you are prepared.

I’ve begun bleeding, but I’m not sure if I’m miscarrying. Should I call my doctor?

You need to confirm that you are miscarrying with your doctor, if you haven’t already. He or she can help you know what symptoms to look for in order that you can seek medical help, if needed. Symptoms can include excessive bleeding, fever, dizziness/lightheadedness, increased heart rate, and foul-smelling discharge. It is better to be safe than sorry to avoid complications.

I’ve recovered what I can of my baby. Where do I bury him or her?

Store your baby’s remains in saline solution or in the freezer until you can arrange for burial. Purchase or make a small wooden box or something similar as a burial vessel. You may want to contact your parish/pastor first about your parish’s cemetery. Otherwise, the Diocese of Madison cemeteries offer free burials (and granite markers in the Madison cemetery). The Miracle of Life Rosary Garden at St. Mary’s Pine Bluff is another option, offering markers for purchase and free burial vessels. St. Mary’s Pine Bluff also has limited space to store babies’ remains until burial, particularly over the winter. There are other memorials for burial available throughout the country. Arrange for a graveside service or have a Mass for your child.

I have lost this child. How can I honor his or her short life?

You could name your child. If you know or have a feeling that your child is a boy or girl, go with it. Some families have chosen to use a feminine first name and masculine middle name or vice versa. If no name comes to mind, you can remember your child as “Baby [Last Name]” or “Beloved Child.” This is your decision. You could include your child in your daily prayers, asking for his or her intercession. You could have a physical memorial to your child, which could be a piece of jewelry you wear, a special image or statue, or anything tangible by which you can remember your child. Your grief is not silly or overdone. This child was a blessing from God with whom you long to be reunited one day.

These FAQs may be the tip of the iceberg for you, and you might just want more information on the miscarriage experience. At St. Catherine Ministry, we’re here for you!

We would love to connect with you directly to offer support. Please contact us at (608) 445-2064 or send us a message by clicking below.